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(E) Some days you are the dog, some days you're the hydrant
http://www.croatia.org/crown/articles/6454/1/E-Some-days-you-are-the-dog-some-days-youre-the-hydrant.html
By Nenad N. Bach
Published on 04/5/2002
 
 
THE SENILITY PRAYER 
 
God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, 
the good fortune to run into the ones that I do, 
and the eyesight to tell the difference. 
 
Now that I'm older (but refuse to grow up) 
here's what I've discovered.... 
 
ONE - I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it. 
 
TWO - My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran. 
 
THREE - I finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart. 
 
FOUR - Funny, I don't remember being absent minded. 
 
FIVE - All reports are in, life is now officially unfair. 
 
SIX - If all is not lost, where is it? 
 
SEVEN - It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser. 
 
EIGHT - Some days you are the dog, some days you're the hydrant. 
 
NINE - I wish the buck stopped here, I sure could use a few. 
 
TEN - Kids in the back seat cause accidents. 
 
ELEVEN - Accidents in the back seat cause kids. 
 
TWELVE - It's hard to make a come back when 
you haven't been anywhere. 
 
THIRTEEN - The only time the world beats a path to your door 
is when you're in the bathroom. 
 
FOURTEEN - If God wanted me to touch my toes, 
he would have put them on my knees. 
 
FIFTEEN - When I'm finally holding all the cards, 
why does everyone decide to play chess? 
 
SIXTEEN - It's not hard to meet expenses...they're everywhere. 
 
SEVENTEEN - The only difference between a rut and 
a grave is the depth. 
 
EIGHTEEN - These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter... 
I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm here after. 
 
NINETEEN - I AM UNABLE TO REMEMBER IF I HAVE MAILED THIS TO YOU BEFORE OR NOT 
 
 
Distributed by www.CroatianWorld.net. This message is intended for Croatian Associations/Institutions and their Friends in Croatia and in the World. The opinions/articles expressed on this list do not reflect personal opinions of the moderator. If the reader of this message is not the intended recipient, please delete or destroy all copies of this communication and please, let us know! 

(E) Some days you are the dog, some days you're the hydrant
 
THE SENILITY PRAYER 
 
God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, 
the good fortune to run into the ones that I do, 
and the eyesight to tell the difference. 
 
Now that I'm older (but refuse to grow up) 
here's what I've discovered.... 
 
ONE - I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it. 
 
TWO - My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran. 
 
THREE - I finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart. 
 
FOUR - Funny, I don't remember being absent minded. 
 
FIVE - All reports are in, life is now officially unfair. 
 
SIX - If all is not lost, where is it? 
 
SEVEN - It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser. 
 
EIGHT - Some days you are the dog, some days you're the hydrant. 
 
NINE - I wish the buck stopped here, I sure could use a few. 
 
TEN - Kids in the back seat cause accidents. 
 
ELEVEN - Accidents in the back seat cause kids. 
 
TWELVE - It's hard to make a come back when 
you haven't been anywhere. 
 
THIRTEEN - The only time the world beats a path to your door 
is when you're in the bathroom. 
 
FOURTEEN - If God wanted me to touch my toes, 
he would have put them on my knees. 
 
FIFTEEN - When I'm finally holding all the cards, 
why does everyone decide to play chess? 
 
SIXTEEN - It's not hard to meet expenses...they're everywhere. 
 
SEVENTEEN - The only difference between a rut and 
a grave is the depth. 
 
EIGHTEEN - These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter... 
I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm here after. 
 
NINETEEN - I AM UNABLE TO REMEMBER IF I HAVE MAILED THIS TO YOU BEFORE OR NOT 
 
 
Distributed by www.CroatianWorld.net. This message is intended for Croatian Associations/Institutions and their Friends in Croatia and in the World. The opinions/articles expressed on this list do not reflect personal opinions of the moderator. If the reader of this message is not the intended recipient, please delete or destroy all copies of this communication and please, let us know!